MANUSCRIPT: NYHS ADDRESS: Hon. Campbell P. White / Member of Congress / WashINGTON / D. C. POSTMARK: NEW-YORK / APL / 16.
New York Apl. 22 1834
It is some time since I went through your book for the purpose of noting such passages as appeared to me capable of amendment--though from my delaying to write you might think that I had neglected it. You shall have my animadversions since you ask for them though I do not place much stress on them. 1 The line page 33
I felt its sunny peace come warm and mild
To my young heart &c--
strikes me as faulty. The epithet mild I think tautologous as applied to peace. It is much like "mild and gentle sympathy" in my Thanatopsis. In Thoughts on the Soul I am certain I found a bad rhyme when I read the first edition. I have gone over it two or three times in search of it but cannot find it. I have marked the line
"Life in itself, it life to all things gives," p. 89.
as a harsh inversion. In the Husband and Wife's Grave the line
Of uncreated light have visited and lived,
is an Alexandrine which rarely has a good effect in heroic rhyme and is not used at all in blank verse, and as I think with good reason.
Page 118 Dear Goddess I grow old I trow
My head is growing gray
In this passage the word grow is repeated without any beauty of effect.
Page 134 Nor live the shame of those who bore their part &c
Is not this passage obscure?
Page 114 Query as to the phrase "go with care"