FATHER. I won't be baptized and I will be a Christian! I beg to inform you I'll be a Christian in my own way.
VINNIE. Clare, don't you want to meet us all in Heaven?
FATHER. Of course! And I'm going to!
VINNIE. But you can't go to Heaven if you're not baptized.
FATHER. That's a lot of folderol!
VINNIE. Clarence Day, don't you blaspheme like that! You're coming to church with me before you go to the office in the morning and be baptized then and there!
FATHER. Vinnie, don't be ridiculous! If you think I'm going to stand there and have some minister splash water on me at my age, you're mistaken!
VINNIE. But, Clare--
FATHER. That's enough of this, Vinnie. I'm hungry.
[Draws himself up and starts for the door. He does not realize that he and VINNIEare now engaged in a battle to the death.]
I'm dressing for dinner.
[Throws open the doors, revealing WHITNEYand HARLAN, who obviously have been eavesdropping and have heard the awful revelation of FATHER'S paganism. FATHER stalks past them upstairs. The two boys come down into the room staring at their mother, who has been standing, too shocked at FATHER'S callous impiety to speak or move.]
WHITNEY. Mother, if Father hasn't been baptized he hasn't any name. In the sight of the Church he hasn't any name.
VINNIE. That's right! [To herself] Maybe we're not even married!
[This awful thought takes possession of VINNIE. Her eyes turn slowly toward the children and she suddenly realizes their doubtful status. Her hand goes to her mouth to cover a quick gasp of horror as the curtain falls.]
The following Sunday. Alter church.
The stage is empty as the curtain rises. VINNIE comes into the archway from the street door, dressed in her Sunday best, carrying her prayer book,