MARRIAGE is a struggle, a constant struggle to relate intimately to another human being without being controlled or taken for granted. It can be a playful struggle that enriches both spouses and fosters their growth, or it can be a deadly struggle, in which one or both spouses are convinced that their emotional--even physical--survival is at stake.
Treating dysfunctional marriages is also a struggle, and it too can be either playful and enriching or deadly and draining. Therapists often complain about the difficulty of listening to people's marital woes and the discouragement in seeing them stuck in the same place week after week. But the fascination of helping couples deal with their problems is supplemented by the intellectual excitement of testing and evaluating the varied approaches to marital therapy that have evolved over the years.
Our own approach has found something valuable in all these therapies. It is presented as one way of doing marital therapy. We make no claim that it is the final word, but only that we have found this approach useful.