Tad: I done laugh till I mighty nigh bus open.
Scip: Wuh make you laugh?
Scip: Wuh Jim?
Tad: Ole Crazy Jim wuh works for de white folks, an' be ain' so crazy nuther.
Voice: Tell we 'bout it.
Tad: Well, de white folks come down to Congaree wid striped pants on an' a jim swinger coat dat wouldn't take a lick off'n him, wid a red flower in he button hole. He look so good he look like he guh git married or serve God, or like he guh do sompen you can't put no 'pendence in, an' he called Jim an' he said, "Jim, you been a faithful servant to me an' I wants to show you my 'preciation by presenting you with this little token of my esteem," den he hand Jim a quart of liquor, an' he says, "Jim, I want you to take charge of my kitchen tomorrow. I has some distinguished ladies and gentlemens comin' as my guests. I want you to cook breakfast an' prepare my Christmas dinner." Jim thank him an' tell him he look like the president of the Nunited States and tell him he guh do some cookin' ain't nobody never see nothin' like it 'efore, an' dey both went off perfectly satisfied, 'cept I ain't blame Jim for looking satisfied.
Tad: When breakfast come, ain't everybody satisfied.
Voice: How come?
Tad: Jim been in dat kitchen at sun-up. He 'larmed de neighborhood singin' hymns. He woked up everybody in de big house, an' de boss was rollin' 'round so uneasy he look like he have fleas on him. He act like he scared to git out er bed. Ole Miss ain't been able to stand it; she jump out er bed an' dash down to de kitchen, an' when she git dere Jim been makin' batter cakes on de kitchen shelf an' tryin' to turn 'em over. He say dey look like dey won't brown, an' Ole Miss been hot, she say, "What are this? I ain't goin' to have no such doings. What will de Bishop think?" An' she run Jim off. But dat ain't all.