LOV. No, that would make you blush worse than t'other.
BER. Why, do you intend to make me blush?
LOV. Faith, I can't tell that; but if I do, it shall be in the dark. (Pulling her.) 80
BER. O, heavens! I would not be in the dark with you for all the world.
LOV. I'll try that. (Puts out the candles.)
BER. O Lord! are you mad? What shall I do for light? 85
LOV. You'll do as well without it.
BER. Why, one can't find a chair to sit down!
LOV. Come into the closet, madam: there's moonshine upon the couch.
BER. Nay, never pull, for I will not go. 90
LOV. Then you must be carried. (Carrying her.)
BER. (very softly). Help, help, I'm ravished, ruined, undone! O Lord, I shall never be able to bear it. [Exeunt.]
SIR TUNBELLY's house.
Enter MISS HOYDEN, Nurse, YOUNG FASHION, and BULL.
Y.FAS. This quick dispatch of yours, Mr. Bull, I take so kindly, it shall give you a claim to my favor as long as I live, I do assure you.
MISS. And to mine too, I promise you.
BULL. I must humbly thank your honors, and 5 I hope, since it has been my lot to join you in the holy bands of wedlock, you will so well cultivate the soil which I have craved a blessing on that your children may swarm about you like bees about a honey-comb. 10
MISS. I'cod, with all my heart: the more the merrier, I say; ha, nurse?
Enter LORY, taking his master hastily aside.
LO. One word with you, for heaven's sake.
Y. FAS. What the devil's the matter?
LO. Sir, your fortune's ruined, and I don't 15 think your life's worth a quarter of an hour's purchase: yonder's your brother arrived with two coaches and six horses, twenty footmen and pages, a coat worth fourscore pound, and a periwig down to his knees: so judge what will become of your 20 lady's heart.
Y. FAS. Death and Furies! 'tis impossible.
LO. Fiends and spectres, sir! 'tis true.
Y. FAS. Is he in the house yet?
LO. No, they are capitulating with him at the 25 gate; the porter tells him he's come to run away with Miss Hoyden, and has cocked the blunderbuss at him; your brother swears, Gad damme, they are a parcel of dawns, and he has a good mind to break off the match; but they have given the word for Sir 30 Tunbelly, so I doubt all will come out presently. Pray, Sir, resolve what you'll do this moment, for i'gad they'll maul you.
Y. FAS. Stay a little. ----- (To MISS HOYDEN.) My dear, here's a troublesome business my man 35 tells me of; but don't be frightened, we shall be too hard for the rogue. Here's an impudent fellow at the gate (not knowing I was come hither incognito) has taken my name upon him, in hopes to run away with you. 40
MISS. Oh, the brazen-faced varlet! it's well we are married, or may be we might never a been so.
Y. FAS. (aside). I'gad, like enough! -----Prithee, dear doctor, run to Sir Tunbelly and stop him from going to the gate before I speak with him. 45
BULL. I fly, my good lord ----- Exit BULL.
NURSE. An't please your honor, my lady and I had best lock ourselves up till the danger be over.
Y. FAS. Ay, by all means.
MISS. Not so fast: I won't be locked up any 50 more. I'm married.
Y. FAS. Yes, pray, my dear, do, till we have seized this rascal.
MISS. Nay, if you pray me, I'll do any thing.
Exeunt Miss HOYDENand Nurse.
Y. FAS. Oh! here's Sir Tunbelly coming. --- --55 (To LORY.) Hark you, sirrah, things are better than you imagine: the wedding's over.
LO. The devil it is, sir.
Y. FAS. Not a word, all's safe: but Sir Tunbelly don't know it, nor must not yet; so I am resolved 60 to brazen the business out, and have the pleasure of turning the impostor1 upon his lordship, which I believe may easily be done.
Enter SIR TUNBELLY, Chaplain and Servants armed.
Y. FAS. Did you ever hear, Sir, of so impudent an undertaking? 65
SIR TUN. Never, by the mass; but we'll tickle him, I'll warrant him.
Y. FAS. They tell me, Sir, he has a great many people with him disguised like servants.
SIR TUN. Ay, ay, rogues enough; but I'll soon 70 raise the posse upon 'em.
Y. FAS. Sir, if you'll take my advice, we'll go a shorter way to work; I find, whoever this spark is, he knows nothing of my being privately here; so if you pretend to receive him civilly, he'll enter 75 without suspicion; and as soon as he is within the gate we'll whip up the drawbridge upon his back, let fly the blunderbuss to disperse his crew, and so commit him to goal.2____________________